Has anyone here read the Qu'ran?

[Santa_Claus]

Has anyone here read the Qu'ran?

read it? I fuckin' wrote it

FACT.

[devogue]

Anyone know of an English translation that is easy to read? I wouldn't mind having a copy handy.

Yeah, you can have my copy.

Rachel, come and stay with me while he's reading it.

[jaydot]

found a translation online and it turned out to be a similar morass of turgid tripe to the bible and that was boring as shite.

[Robert_S]

I tried to read it through, but a stain on the carpet ended up being more intriguing.

Anyone know of an English translation that is easy to read? I wouldn't mind having a copy handy.

Doesn't the local mosque or outreach center give them away for free?

[Thinking Aloud]

I tried to read it through, but a stain on the carpet ended up being more intriguing.

Anyone know of an English translation that is easy to read? I wouldn't mind having a copy handy.

Doesn't the local mosque or outreach center give them away for free?

Oh yes, and Pappa - when you go round to collect one, make sure you have a really bad itch on your arm that you just have to pull your sleeve up to scratch as you turn to walk away. Yes - just there.

[Pappa]

Doesn't the local mosque or outreach center give them away for free?

Oh yes, and Pappa - when you go round to collect one, make sure you have a really bad itch on your arm that you just have to pull your sleeve up to scratch as you turn to walk away. Yes - just there.

Actually, I do have plans to go to the local mosque soonish.... erm... I mean. I'll tell you later.

[Tigger]

[Xamonas Chegwé]

Doesn't the local mosque or outreach center give them away for free?

Oh yes, and Pappa - when you go round to collect one, make sure you have a really bad itch on your arm that you just have to pull your sleeve up to scratch as you turn to walk away. Yes - just there.

Actually, I do have plans to go to the local mosque soonish.... erm... I mean. I'll tell you later.

[MrFungus420]

I read three quarters of it. It started getting repetitive and boring. Keeps talking about casting people in to a see of fire and all other nasty shit. Full of sectarianism, sexism, anti-Semitism, homophobia, hypocrisy and outright silliness like the stars are missiles to ward off demons.

It was the other quarter that talked about science and being nice to everyone.

No. None of it's about science...

[MrFungus420]

I tried to read it through, but a stain on the carpet ended up being more intriguing.

Anyone know of an English translation that is easy to read? I wouldn't mind having a copy handy.

Doesn't the local mosque or outreach center give them away for free?

Oh yes, and Pappa - when you go round to collect one, make sure you have a really bad itch on your arm that you just have to pull your sleeve up to scratch as you turn to walk away. Yes - just there.

And when they hand it to you, take it with your left hand.

[Tigger]

I tried to read it through, but a stain on the carpet ended up being more intriguing.

Anyone know of an English translation that is easy to read? I wouldn't mind having a copy handy.

Doesn't the local mosque or outreach center give them away for free?

Oh yes, and Pappa - when you go round to collect one, make sure you have a really bad itch on your arm that you just have to pull your sleeve up to scratch as you turn to walk away. Yes - just there.

And when they hand it to you, take it with your left hand.

No, get a woman to take it with her left hand...
while holding a box of tampons in the other..
wearing a bikini.
And carrying a degree certificate/stethoscope or some paraphernalia of education beyond that hideous tome's preachings.

[Xamonas Chegwé]

I tried to read it through, but a stain on the carpet ended up being more intriguing.

Anyone know of an English translation that is easy to read? I wouldn't mind having a copy handy.

Doesn't the local mosque or outreach center give them away for free?

Oh yes, and Pappa - when you go round to collect one, make sure you have a really bad itch on your arm that you just have to pull your sleeve up to scratch as you turn to walk away. Yes - just there.

And when they hand it to you, take it with your left hand.

No, get a woman to take it with her left hand...
while holding a box of tampons in the other..
wearing a bikini.
And carrying a degree certificate/stethoscope or some paraphernalia of education beyond that hideous tome's preachings.

...and obviously, a bacon butty.

[GenesForLife]

Also ask if "he is made from a gushing fluid, which emanates from between the ribs and the loins" and ask if he volunteers for an experiment, castration followed by seeing if he can fertilize an egg

[Tero]

I have the Quran next to my bed. It starts out horribly - talking about people who don't recognise that God and Mohammed are the real deal ought to be killed. I stopped around page three...

But you're probably reading it in the "wrong" order, and in the wrong language, so it's no surprise it doesn't read right.

That's the trouble with all them bibbles. And even the words do not mean the same 1000-2000 years later.