Holy Crap!
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Santa_Claus
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by Santa_Claus » Thu Dec 09, 2010 6:14 pm
Has anyone here read the Qu'ran?
read it? I fuckin' wrote it
FACT.
I am Leader of all The Atheists in the world - FACT.
Come look inside Santa's Hole
You want to hear the truth about Santa Claus???.....you couldn't handle the truth about Santa Claus!!!
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devogue
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by devogue » Thu Dec 09, 2010 6:20 pm
Pappa wrote:Anyone know of an English translation that is easy to read? I wouldn't mind having a copy handy.
Yeah, you can have my copy.
Rachel, come and stay with me while he's reading it.

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jaydot
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by jaydot » Thu Dec 09, 2010 6:54 pm
found a translation online and it turned out to be a similar morass of turgid tripe to the bible and that was boring as shite.
open source the world.
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Robert_S
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by Robert_S » Thu Dec 09, 2010 7:50 pm
I tried to read it through, but a stain on the carpet ended up being more intriguing.
Pappa wrote:Anyone know of an English translation that is easy to read? I wouldn't mind having a copy handy.
Doesn't the local mosque or outreach center give them away for free?
What I've found with a few discussions I've had lately is this self-satisfaction that people express with their proffessed open mindedness. In realty it ammounts to wilful ignorance and intellectual cowardice as they are choosing to not form any sort of opinion on a particular topic. Basically "I don't know and I'm not going to look at any evidence because I'm quite happy on this fence."
-Mr P
The Net is best considered analogous to communication with disincarnate intelligences. As any neophyte would tell you. Do not invoke that which you have no facility to banish.
Audley Strange
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Thinking Aloud
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by Thinking Aloud » Thu Dec 09, 2010 8:01 pm
Robert_S wrote:I tried to read it through, but a stain on the carpet ended up being more intriguing.
Pappa wrote:Anyone know of an English translation that is easy to read? I wouldn't mind having a copy handy.
Doesn't the local mosque or outreach center give them away for free?
Oh yes, and Pappa - when you go round to collect one, make sure you have a really bad itch on your arm that you just have to pull your sleeve up to scratch as you turn to walk away. Yes - just
there.

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Pappa
- Non-Practicing Anarchist

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by Pappa » Thu Dec 09, 2010 8:04 pm
Thinking Aloud wrote:Robert_S wrote:
Doesn't the local mosque or outreach center give them away for free?
Oh yes, and Pappa - when you go round to collect one, make sure you have a really bad itch on your arm that you just have to pull your sleeve up to scratch as you turn to walk away. Yes - just
there.

Actually, I do have plans to go to the local mosque soonish.... erm... I mean. I'll tell you later.

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Tigger
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by Tigger » Thu Dec 09, 2010 8:50 pm
Seth wrote:Fuck that, I like opening Pandora's box and shoving my tool inside it
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Xamonas Chegwé
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by Xamonas Chegwé » Fri Dec 10, 2010 2:02 am
Pappa wrote:Thinking Aloud wrote:Robert_S wrote:
Doesn't the local mosque or outreach center give them away for free?
Oh yes, and Pappa - when you go round to collect one, make sure you have a really bad itch on your arm that you just have to pull your sleeve up to scratch as you turn to walk away. Yes - just
there.

Actually, I do have plans to go to the local mosque soonish.... erm... I mean. I'll tell you later.


A book is a version of the world. If you do not like it, ignore it; or offer your own version in return.
Salman Rushdie
You talk to God, you're religious. God talks to you, you're psychotic.
House MD
Who needs a meaning anyway, I'd settle anyday for a very fine view.
Sandy Denny
This is the wrong forum for bluffing 
Paco
Yes, yes. But first I need to show you this venomous fish!
Calilasseia
I think we should do whatever Pawiz wants.
Twoflower
Bella squats momentarily then waddles on still peeing, like a horse
Millefleur
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MrFungus420
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by MrFungus420 » Fri Dec 10, 2010 9:45 am
Thinking Aloud wrote:Animavore wrote:I read three quarters of it. It started getting repetitive and boring. Keeps talking about casting people in to a see of fire and all other nasty shit. Full of sectarianism, sexism, anti-Semitism, homophobia, hypocrisy and outright silliness like the stars are missiles to ward off demons.
It was the other quarter that talked about science and being nice to everyone.
No. None of it's about science...
P1: I am a nobody.
P2: Nobody is perfect.
C: Therefore, I am perfect
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MrFungus420
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by MrFungus420 » Fri Dec 10, 2010 9:50 am
Thinking Aloud wrote:Robert_S wrote:I tried to read it through, but a stain on the carpet ended up being more intriguing.
Pappa wrote:Anyone know of an English translation that is easy to read? I wouldn't mind having a copy handy.
Doesn't the local mosque or outreach center give them away for free?
Oh yes, and Pappa - when you go round to collect one, make sure you have a really bad itch on your arm that you just have to pull your sleeve up to scratch as you turn to walk away. Yes - just
there.

And when they hand it to you, take it with your
left hand.

P1: I am a nobody.
P2: Nobody is perfect.
C: Therefore, I am perfect
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Tigger
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by Tigger » Fri Dec 10, 2010 3:22 pm
MrFungus420 wrote:Thinking Aloud wrote:Robert_S wrote:I tried to read it through, but a stain on the carpet ended up being more intriguing.
Pappa wrote:Anyone know of an English translation that is easy to read? I wouldn't mind having a copy handy.
Doesn't the local mosque or outreach center give them away for free?
Oh yes, and Pappa - when you go round to collect one, make sure you have a really bad itch on your arm that you just have to pull your sleeve up to scratch as you turn to walk away. Yes - just
there.

And when they hand it to you, take it with your
left hand.

No, get a woman to take it with her left hand...
while holding a box of tampons in the other..
wearing a bikini.
And carrying a degree certificate/stethoscope or some paraphernalia of education beyond that hideous tome's preachings.
Seth wrote:Fuck that, I like opening Pandora's box and shoving my tool inside it
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Xamonas Chegwé
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I speak 9 languages fluently, one of which other people can also speak.
When backed into a corner, I fit perfectly - having a right-angled arse.
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by Xamonas Chegwé » Fri Dec 10, 2010 3:26 pm
Tigger wrote:MrFungus420 wrote:Thinking Aloud wrote:Robert_S wrote:I tried to read it through, but a stain on the carpet ended up being more intriguing.
Pappa wrote:Anyone know of an English translation that is easy to read? I wouldn't mind having a copy handy.
Doesn't the local mosque or outreach center give them away for free?
Oh yes, and Pappa - when you go round to collect one, make sure you have a really bad itch on your arm that you just have to pull your sleeve up to scratch as you turn to walk away. Yes - just
there.

And when they hand it to you, take it with your
left hand.

No, get a woman to take it with her left hand...
while holding a box of tampons in the other..
wearing a bikini.
And carrying a degree certificate/stethoscope or some paraphernalia of education beyond that hideous tome's preachings.
...and obviously, a bacon butty.

A book is a version of the world. If you do not like it, ignore it; or offer your own version in return.
Salman Rushdie
You talk to God, you're religious. God talks to you, you're psychotic.
House MD
Who needs a meaning anyway, I'd settle anyday for a very fine view.
Sandy Denny
This is the wrong forum for bluffing 
Paco
Yes, yes. But first I need to show you this venomous fish!
Calilasseia
I think we should do whatever Pawiz wants.
Twoflower
Bella squats momentarily then waddles on still peeing, like a horse
Millefleur
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GenesForLife
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by GenesForLife » Sat Dec 11, 2010 10:11 pm
Also ask if "he is made from a gushing fluid, which emanates from between the ribs and the loins" and ask if he volunteers for an experiment, castration followed by seeing if he can fertilize an egg

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Tero
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by Tero » Sat Dec 11, 2010 10:39 pm
Thinking Aloud wrote:nellikin wrote:I have the Quran next to my bed. It starts out horribly - talking about people who don't recognise that God and Mohammed are the real deal ought to be killed. I stopped around page three...
But you're probably reading it in the "wrong" order, and in the wrong language, so it's no surprise it doesn't read right.

That's the trouble with all them bibbles. And even the words do not mean the same 1000-2000 years later.
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