Top 10 of Why Beer is Better Than Jesus

[MattShizzle]

This was in the latest issue of Freethought Today.

10. No one will kill you for not drinking beer
9. Beer does not tell you how to have sex
8. Beer has never caused a major war.
7. They don't force beer on minors who can't think for themselves.
6. When you have a beer, you don't knock on peoples' doors trying to give it away.
5. Nobody's ever been bruned at the stake, hanged or tortured over his brand of beer
4. You don't have to wait 2000+ years for a second beer
3. There are laws saying beer labels can't lie to you
2. You can prove you have a beer
1. If you have devoted your life to beer, there are groups to help you stop.

[Xamonas Chegwé]

0. Beer will never cut off a part of your penis (although it may, with overuse, make it appear that it has!)

[Sælir]

[charlou]

to that.

[tattuchu]

[quote="MattShizzle"]This was in the latest issue of Freethought Today.

6. When you have a beer, you don't knock on peoples' doors trying to give it away.
4. You don't have to wait 2000+ years for a second beer

I like these the best

[Pappa]

8. Beer has never caused a major war.

I find that hard to believe.

[FBM]

Maybe the key word is "major."

[Pappa]

Maybe the key word is "major."

I heard Archduke Franz Ferdinand of Austria was an inveterate drunkard.

[rachelbean]

9. Beer does not tell you how to have sex

Categorically untrue

7. They don't force beer on minors who can't think for themselves.

Who is "they"? I'm sure some people do. Maybe it should say, "It's not legal to force beer on minors"

6. When you have a beer, you don't knock on peoples' doors trying to give it away.

Depends on how lonely you are and what kind of a drunk

1. If you have devoted your life to beer, there are groups to help you stop.

Why would you want to stop

[Berthold]

Maybe the key word is "major."

I heard Archduke Franz Ferdinand of Austria was an inveterate drunkard.

However, that wasn't the cause of his death.

[Mysturji]

8. Beer has never caused a major war.

I'm not so sure about that one.

5. Nobody's ever been bruned at the stake, hanged or tortured over his brand of beer

I don't think anyone has ever been bruned at the stake.

[Gawdzilla Sama]

Maybe the key word is "major."

I heard Archduke Franz Ferdinand of Austria was an inveterate drunkard.

However, that wasn't the cause of his death.

Nope, but his driver must have been drunk.

[Xamonas Chegwé]

5. Nobody's ever been bruned at the stake, hanged or tortured over his brand of beer

I don't think anyone has ever been bruned at the stake.

There have probably been a few. Just lightly browned for something slightly less than a mortal sin. A kind of cautionary staking.

[Gawdzilla Sama]

5. Nobody's ever been bruned at the stake, hanged or tortured over his brand of beer

I don't think anyone has ever been bruned at the stake.

There have probably been a few. Just lightly browned for something slightly less than a mortal sin. A kind of cautionary staking.

I think a few of us have been Iron Bru'd.

[Feck]

5. Nobody's ever been bruned at the stake, hanged or tortured over his brand of beer

I don't think anyone has ever been bruned at the stake.

There have probably been a few. Just lightly browned for something slightly less than a mortal sin. A kind of cautionary staking.

I think a few of us have been Iron Bru'd.

Irn-Bru'd