Priceless Quotes Directed At You By Theists...

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Priceless Quotes Directed At You By Theists...

Post by piscator » Mon Mar 01, 2010 8:38 am

got any good ones?

here's a few to kick things off, all from adults:


"I have plenty of faith in 'The ends i desire justify whatever bullshit i have to sling'"



"And I'm sure they see the venom dripping off your lathering fangs."



"You're so fucking honorable and dignified. I guess I'm just Valley Trash." [an Alaska reference: Sarah Palin lives in 'The Valley']



"You call me ridiculous, and then type that with nobody's fingers but your own?"



"Were you an altar boy? Is that what your problem is about?"
Last edited by piscator on Mon Mar 01, 2010 8:42 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Priceless Quotes Directed At you By Theists...

Post by Chinaski » Mon Mar 01, 2010 8:42 am

"Is it lonely in a world without faith?"

I was drunk, so I ignored her.
Is there for honest poverty
That hangs his heid and a' that
The coward slave, we pass him by
We dare be puir for a' that.

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Re: Priceless Quotes Directed At You By Theists...

Post by AshtonBlack » Mon Mar 01, 2010 8:47 am

"You can't learn about the bible just from reading it, you need to go to church to really understand it."

A theist to me, having just quoted some of the really distasteful shit.

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Re: Priceless Quotes Directed At You By Theists...

Post by Valden » Mon Mar 01, 2010 8:54 am

AshtonBlack wrote:"You can't learn about the bible just from reading it, you need to go to church to really understand it."

A theist to me, having just quoted some of the really distasteful shit.
I hope you told that theist that there are plenty of Christians who don't go to Church and believe everything their pastor says. :hehe:

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Re: Priceless Quotes Directed At You By Theists...

Post by Apollonius » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:03 pm

Of course Jesus performs miracles. Look at all those patients where a dr say there us no hope, but prayers are answered and people get better.... I hear about them on TV shows all the time...
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Re: Priceless Quotes Directed At You By Theists...

Post by jd » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:20 pm

From a moderate, and generally rational, theist:

"I guess it's hard to believe in God if you've thought about it..."
"Wooberish" - a neologism for woo expressed in gibberish.

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Re: Priceless Quotes Directed At You By Theists...

Post by Gawdzilla Sama » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:25 pm

I'll post my favorite for the win.

I had a good collection of sealife fossils I'd collected in MISSOURI, that famous seashore state, and my cousin was looking at them with obvious fascination (AKA "deer in the headlights"). She touched one and said, "I wonder if we're even supposed to ask why God made some creatures out of stone."
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Re: Priceless Quotes Directed At You By Theists...

Post by statichaos » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:28 pm

Hell, I AM a theist, and I've received some doozies:

"But you can't trust scientists. I worship God. They worship Darwin, a man."

"Homosexuals commit their acts to reject God." Now, I love that one because he doesn't say "Homosexuals are rejecting God through their actions." He's saying that rejection of God is the motivation in the first place.

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Re: Priceless Quotes Directed At You By Theists...

Post by Feck » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:34 pm

"You're just a protestant who doesn't believe any more ." mmmmm don't I love sectarians ......sooo much fun so little hatred :funny:
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Re: Priceless Quotes Directed At You By Theists...

Post by MrFungus420 » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:36 pm

Gawdzilla wrote:I'll post my favorite for the win.

I had a good collection of sealife fossils I'd collected in MISSOURI, that famous seashore state, and my cousin was looking at them with obvious fascination (AKA "deer in the headlights"). She touched one and said, "I wonder if we're even supposed to ask why God made some creatures out of stone."
Veeerrrrrrryyyyyyy interestink........

(Ok, that's more because of the new avatar than the post itself...) :biggrin:
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Re: Priceless Quotes Directed At You By Theists...

Post by Gawdzilla Sama » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:39 pm

MrFungus420 wrote:
Gawdzilla wrote:I'll post my favorite for the win.

I had a good collection of sealife fossils I'd collected in MISSOURI, that famous seashore state, and my cousin was looking at them with obvious fascination (AKA "deer in the headlights"). She touched one and said, "I wonder if we're even supposed to ask why God made some creatures out of stone."
Veeerrrrrrryyyyyyy interestink........

(Ok, that's more because of the new avatar than the post itself...) :biggrin:
This was the lady who bought a monitor that rotates because her pictures were printing in portrait instead of landscape. ~$400 monitor. She was sad that it didn't solve her problem.
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Re: Priceless Quotes Directed At You By Theists...

Post by Banzai! » Mon Mar 01, 2010 9:44 pm

you want awful theist rubbish try the comments on this scientific american article :funny: more canards per paragraph than i have seen since byers !
meh

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Re: Priceless Quotes Directed At You By Theists...

Post by Dr. Kwaltz » Mon Mar 01, 2010 11:22 pm

Apollonius wrote:Of course Jesus performs miracles. Look at all those patients where a dr say there us no hope, but prayers are answered and people get better.... I hear about them on TV shows all the time...
shown along with a phone number to be used for (huge!) donations...

Prayer is just the act of self-delusion.

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Re: Priceless Quotes Directed At You By Theists...

Post by S1E » Tue Mar 02, 2010 12:32 am

Mine would have to be that wonderful all encompassing “How does that prove god doesn’t exist.”

There really is no help for these people!
"So I'll meet 'im later on
At the place where 'e is gone --
Where it's always double drill and no canteen;
'E'll be squattin' on the coals
Givin' drink to poor damned souls,
An' I'll get a swig in hell from Gunga Din!"

Rudyard Kipling

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Re: Priceless Quotes Directed At You By Theists...

Post by duckcake » Tue Mar 02, 2010 12:45 am

Does having a book I was reading chucked at me because it was about another religion count as a quote? :P

"When you get to a bad spot in your life, you won't be able to deal with it without having God by your side."

"People hate Jews because Jews think they are the 'chosen ones' and no one else is special in God's eyes. They also killed Jesus."

I'm sure I could remember some more if I thought about it, but that's what came to mind right away. Gotta love all those tolerant religions of peace where God loves everybody, right?

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