chalkers wrote:lordpasternack wrote:
Person 2: "But don't you know that that woman really values you - and will be devastated to see you go?"
That's how they operate giving praise to exploit people. You've got to keep telling yourself that praise is not the same as respect and that praise is a cheap commodity to part with.
Richard seems to be very good at picking out unsuspecting victims, and unwittingly grooming them to exploit him, backstab each other, fail repeatedly at their jobs, create PR disasters, and then repeatedly cock-up the process of attempting to limit damage and clear up the mess... And then of course, Richard turns up on the all-too-familiar scenes of discord and disarray, and cries his innocent little eyes out about how he can't bear all of this rottenness again - mutters some platitudes - and then continues to fail to address the flagrant problems in the governance of his organisation. And continues to ignore those trying to reason with him. And slips away from arguing with the likes of myself as it becomes obvious that I am cleaning his clock. And so the cycle continues...
As for praise - it became clear to me early on through some rather minor interactions with Richard that he is very easily impressed, and very willing to praise people in a way that is, to me, cloying. It became obvious to me pretty quickly that I could likely very easily take the man, hook, line and sinker, for whatever my own particular self-interests were - and that he would sing my praises, and defend me tooth and nail all the while - even if I backstabbed and exploited HIM. Likely all the more so if it got, uhm, intimate. And that was, he
may be disappointed to discover, one of the first things that
put me off him.
I have a strong visceral dislike of feeling that I am being uncritically, unthinkingly, naively, romanticised and praised - that I am not being challenged or treated with a healthy amount of scepticism (along with respect, of course). And this was a vibe that I picked up from Richard, and I just balked at it. I mean, aside form the fact that it embarrassed me in the immediate term - I was afraid of what I might
let myself do, if I had pursued and indulged him. I saw the potential to be badly corrupted, innocently, and I didn't feel at ease with it. I daresay that some of the flagrant issues within his foundation are a consequence of people having even just a touch less scruples than me?
And to be quite frank - I really do prefer people who have critical thinking and critical inquiry skills that really are more than just a fashion accessory - if we're going to get to that particular point of the issue, here...