Gifts for The Visitors

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Sean Hayden
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Gifts for The Visitors

Post by Sean Hayden » Wed May 16, 2018 5:16 pm

When the aliens finally arrive we'll want to be ready with gifts. What would you give the aliens? I'm thinking I'd give them a watermelon. This, is a fucking watermelon. Have you got anything like this on your planet?

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Re: Gifts for The Visitors

Post by Brian Peacock » Wed May 16, 2018 5:56 pm

"This is a fucking grand piano. Let's see you get your tentacles round that!"
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Clinton Huxley » 21 Jun 2012 » 14:10:36 GMT
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Re: Gifts for The Visitors

Post by Sean Hayden » Wed May 16, 2018 6:07 pm

:lol: -excellent choice. Perhaps Rainbow could join you and do some interpretive dancing.

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Re: Gifts for The Visitors

Post by Animavore » Wed May 16, 2018 6:10 pm

I'd walk up wrapped in a bow and say, "Take me." And get the fuck off this idiotic planet.
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Re: Gifts for The Visitors

Post by PsychoSerenity » Wed May 16, 2018 8:42 pm

Reminded me of something posted here years ago:
PsychoSerenity wrote:
Thu Mar 01, 2012 9:28 pm
I've just had a shocking thought.

Since mammals are the only type of animal that produces milk, and their evolutionary existence is almost purely coincidental, the vast majority of intelligent alien lifeforms throughout the universe will never have tried cheese.
laklak wrote:
Thu Mar 01, 2012 9:42 pm
Ftxgtrg (looking at his plate): What's this called, anyway?

Gtxtxfx: I got it on Urth, it's called cheese.

Ftxgtrg: Looks funny. What IS it?

Gtxtxfx: Well, it's fermented glandular secretions from one of several species of indigenous motile lifeforms, partially digested by bacteria. The blue stuff is mold.

Ftxgtrg: Hmmmmmm....
:biggrin: :cheese:
[Disclaimer - if this is comes across like I think I know what I'm talking about, I want to make it clear that I don't. I'm just trying to get my thoughts down]

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Re: Gifts for The Visitors

Post by JimC » Wed May 16, 2018 9:32 pm

A set of scalpels, a book on human anatomy, and Trump's dead body to practice on... :tea:
Nurse, where the fuck's my cardigan?
And my gin!

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Re: Gifts for The Visitors

Post by Brian Peacock » Wed May 16, 2018 9:41 pm

Sean Hayden wrote:
Wed May 16, 2018 6:07 pm
:lol: -excellent choice. Perhaps Rainbow could join you and do some interpretive dancing.
There's nothing more soul-destroying that spending a lot of time, money and effort to travel to a distant and exotic place only to be forced to endure a round of cod 'traditional' dancing during dinner.

We can make this happen!! :cheer:
Rationalia relies on voluntary donations. There is no obligation of course, but if you value this place and want to see it continue please consider making a small donation towards the forum's running costs.
Details on how to do that can be found here.

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"It isn't necessary to imagine the world ending in fire or ice.
There are two other possibilities: one is paperwork, and the other is nostalgia."

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"This is how humanity ends; bickering over the irrelevant."
Clinton Huxley » 21 Jun 2012 » 14:10:36 GMT
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Re: Gifts for The Visitors

Post by pErvinalia » Thu May 17, 2018 2:04 am

Porn.
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Re: Gifts for The Visitors

Post by pErvinalia » Thu May 17, 2018 2:05 am

Galaxian.
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"The Western world is fucking awesome because of mostly white men" - DaveDodo007.
"Socialized medicine is just exactly as morally defensible as gassing and cooking Jews" - Seth. Yes, he really did say that..
"Seth you are a boon to this community" - Cunt.
"I am seriously thinking of going on a spree killing" - Svartalf.

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Re: Gifts for The Visitors

Post by laklak » Thu May 17, 2018 3:36 am

My Johnson. Suck it, Slug Boy.
Yeah well that's just, like, your opinion, man.

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Re: Gifts for The Visitors

Post by laklak » Thu May 17, 2018 3:47 am

Ya know, I just read PS's quote of something I apparently wrote 6 years ago (how the fuck did you find that PS?). It was pretty fucking good, if I do say so myself. I don't remember posting it, but if I saw it on some forum I'd say - hey, that's pretty fucking good. What am I reduced to now, in my dotage?

"My Johnson. Suck it, Slug Boy"

That's it. That's the best I can do these days. I even sat and thought about it for a while. Kids, this is what 6 years of drugs, booze. and incipient, undiagnosed dementia will do to you. Just say NO.

Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair.
Yeah well that's just, like, your opinion, man.

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Re: Gifts for The Visitors

Post by pErvinalia » Thu May 17, 2018 4:18 am

I hear ya, lak. I look back on my past writings and can barely believe I was that smart and funny. Being a loser has really taken it's toll on me.
Sent from my penis using wankertalk.
"The Western world is fucking awesome because of mostly white men" - DaveDodo007.
"Socialized medicine is just exactly as morally defensible as gassing and cooking Jews" - Seth. Yes, he really did say that..
"Seth you are a boon to this community" - Cunt.
"I am seriously thinking of going on a spree killing" - Svartalf.

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Re: Gifts for The Visitors

Post by laklak » Thu May 17, 2018 4:28 am

Another ten years and we'll have to do this on Skype, 'cuz all we'll be able to do is grunt and drool.

It's sad, brother.
Yeah well that's just, like, your opinion, man.

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Re: Gifts for The Visitors

Post by cronus » Thu May 17, 2018 6:18 am

Bacteria the humblest things upon the Earth, minute and tiny bacteria. Why be original?
What will the world be like after its ruler is removed?

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Re: Gifts for The Visitors

Post by pErvinalia » Thu May 17, 2018 8:30 am

Ebola.
Sent from my penis using wankertalk.
"The Western world is fucking awesome because of mostly white men" - DaveDodo007.
"Socialized medicine is just exactly as morally defensible as gassing and cooking Jews" - Seth. Yes, he really did say that..
"Seth you are a boon to this community" - Cunt.
"I am seriously thinking of going on a spree killing" - Svartalf.

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