They are coming back later when I'm not juggling whiny babies. What should I taunt them with first?I have a new chew toy
I have a new chew toy
Some Jehovahs just came knocking and I'm in a playful mood They are coming back later when I'm not juggling whiny babies. What should I taunt them with first?
They are coming back later when I'm not juggling whiny babies. What should I taunt them with first?Outside the ordered universe is that amorphous blight of nethermost confusion which blasphemes and bubbles at the center of all infinity—the boundless daemon sultan Azathoth, whose name no lips dare speak aloud, and who gnaws hungrily in inconceivable, unlighted chambers beyond time and space amidst the muffled, maddening beating of vile drums and the thin monotonous whine of accursed flutes.
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Thinking Aloud
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Re: I have a new chew toy
Leave YouPorn open on your computer.
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Re: I have a new chew toy
You seem to have the misconception that I'm planning on letting them in. They can stay on the doorstep where I can close the door when I get bored of them
Outside the ordered universe is that amorphous blight of nethermost confusion which blasphemes and bubbles at the center of all infinity—the boundless daemon sultan Azathoth, whose name no lips dare speak aloud, and who gnaws hungrily in inconceivable, unlighted chambers beyond time and space amidst the muffled, maddening beating of vile drums and the thin monotonous whine of accursed flutes.
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Bella Fortuna
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Re: I have a new chew toy
The make sure it's playing loudly in the background so they can hear the moaning and 'Yeah baby's.
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Thinking Aloud
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Re: I have a new chew toy
I have many misconceptions. 
They once stood on my doorstep (in the rain) for 30 minutes while I explained that Mark was the first gospel written, but NO, they thought it was Matthew... 
They once stood on my doorstep (in the rain) for 30 minutes while I explained that Mark was the first gospel written, but NO, they thought it was Matthew... http://thinking-aloud.co.uk/ Musical Me
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Atheist-Lite
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Re: I have a new chew toy
Ask them for mags - your interested but want to learn, any back issues? Keep the front and don't let on and you'll maybe get a free Bible too? One day you know they'll ask for money so mention the sins of loving money...it's the root of all evil. You'll have a stash of JW mags and some books which can be used for alsorts of things. Scaring away annoying relatives for instance? 
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Rum
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Re: I have a new chew toy
Ask them how much money do you get from the JWs if you convert.
Re: I have a new chew toy
I engage them when I'm in the mood...I find using selected bible quotes makes them wince quite nicely; they're pretty much bible literalists, which makes it easy!Azathoth wrote:Some Jehovahs just came knocking and I'm in a playful mood
Another quite good one is their belief that only 144,000 will be raptured (or whatever they call it), yet I think they claim over 7 million adherents...
"...anyone who says it’s “just the Internet” can. And then when they come back, they can
Re: I have a new chew toy
Offer them coffee and atheist pamphlets.
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Thinking Aloud
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Re: I have a new chew toy
Don't waste the pamphlets. I once read they have to throw away anything they're given at the first opportunity - unread.juju2112 wrote:Offer them coffee and atheist pamphlets.
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Re: I have a new chew toy
Oh, that's right. It's Mormons that can't have caffeine
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Gawdzilla Sama
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Re: I have a new chew toy
Answer the door naked.
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Re: I have a new chew toy
I have made my mind up. Going to hit them with the contradictions in the 4 resurrection stories to start with. I haz notes
Outside the ordered universe is that amorphous blight of nethermost confusion which blasphemes and bubbles at the center of all infinity—the boundless daemon sultan Azathoth, whose name no lips dare speak aloud, and who gnaws hungrily in inconceivable, unlighted chambers beyond time and space amidst the muffled, maddening beating of vile drums and the thin monotonous whine of accursed flutes.
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Re: I have a new chew toy
... while playing Irish nun porn loudly in the background.Gawdzilla wrote:Answer the door naked.
no fences
Re: I have a new chew toy
Geoff wrote:I engage them when I'm in the mood...I find using selected bible quotes makes them wince quite nicely; they're pretty much bible literalists, which makes it easy!Azathoth wrote:Some Jehovahs just came knocking and I'm in a playful mood
Another quite good one is their belief that only 144,000 will be raptured (or whatever they call it), yet I think they claim over 7 million adherents...
I got them on that one I asked if it was likely that after my colourful life of sin They thought it was likely that I would be saved rather than them ...
They said they didn't know but looked a little hurt by the idea and said that that even if I didn't get into heaven proper that earth was going to be the new eden and I would be happy there ... Their poor little faces when I replied that I thought that was a second rate pyramid selling scheme and that they could go fuck them selves if they thought they would buy their way into heaven on the back of my eternal soul .
Which is polite considering My sister just screams at them that she hopes their children die of Leukaemia
And answering the door naked is old Hat try answering the door in nothing but sweeet sweat and a condom
Last edited by Feck on Wed May 18, 2011 3:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Give me the wine , I don't need the bread
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