Tolstoy's "My Confession": Where do you fit in?

[Audley Strange]

Yeah yeah, beards, misery, a contempt for the state. Sounds like they all went to a 3rd rate liberal arts college.

[Robert_S]

Yeah yeah, beards, misery, a contempt for the state. Sounds like they all went to a 3rd rate liberal arts college.

I'm reminded of this song:




Lyrics:

Trigger Warning!!!1! :

I want to be a mysterious woman
I want to write mysterious songs
I want everyone to wonder
what is she thinking about?
existentialism? nihilism? wrong
I am thinking about
defrosting my refrigerator
but I could get into mysterious mood
watch me ask the bartender
for a drink he cannot make
watch me order mysterious food
food even Julia Child
cannot pronounce right
from cookbooks that time has forgot
then maybe I will read
Crime and Punishment for fun
then again, maybe not

I want to be a mysterious woman
tantalize you with my come-hither stare
maybe it will work a little better
if you pretend I'm not wearing underwear
If you pretend I was never a Girl Scout
and I never learned how to twirl baton
ahhhhhhhhhhhhh
I feel a mysterious song coming on
I think I hear I scream
I think I hear ice cream
melting all over
the rock hard bread
which is stuck to
the chicken parts
long since dead
they're in a cold box
within a cold box
within a warm box
(which is my room)
there's a ceiling
there's a floor
there's a wall
there's a window
look at the moon
it's a marble, it's a button
it's a sequin, it's a polkadot
stiched into the velvet sky
the pocket of Sir Lancelot
who is riding on Pegasus
who is fighting with the Pleiades
who is fighting Cassiopeia
who is fighting with Hercules
who is fighting with Betelguex
who is fighting with the Milky Way
that is stuck to the Bird's Eye Peas
that is stuck to the ice cube tray
that is stuck to the chicken parts
that is stuck to the rock-hard bread
hey, what am I doing here? I should be home defrosting my refrigerator instead

But I want to be a mysterious woman
I hate being so easy to read
hey, bartender, give me a light yeah, a Bud light
and a plate of pommes frites
is all I need.

[Audley Strange]

What a lovely mellow song.

I've often found that attempts at profundity are little more than absurd sophistry written with fake passion.

[Robert_S]

What a lovely mellow song.

I've often found that attempts at profundity are little more than absurd sophistry written with fake passion.

And bold simplifications founded in a lack of imagination.

This is what I found in people who were in the same position as myself through their education and manner of life.

I found that for people of my circle there were four ways out from the terrible condition in which we all are.

That there may be five, six, or perhaps seven hundred and thirty-eight ways out seems to have eluded him and his friends. I feel vindicated that I never actually got around to reading him.

[hadespussercats]

I wanted to make Voltaire my coffee name, but gave up the first try. The Starbucks girl could not spell it.

For some reason, when people ask my name and I don't want to give it I always say, "Sheila."

[JimC]

I wanted to make Voltaire my coffee name, but gave up the first try. The Starbucks girl could not spell it.

For some reason, when people ask my name and I don't want to give it I always say, "Sheila."

This, of course, indicates your secret (but totally understandable) desire to be an Aussie...

[hadespussercats]

I wanted to make Voltaire my coffee name, but gave up the first try. The Starbucks girl could not spell it.

For some reason, when people ask my name and I don't want to give it I always say, "Sheila."

This, of course, indicates your secret (but totally understandable) desire to be an Aussie...

I don't know-- isn't that like calling myself "Dumb Broad"?

[JimC]

I wanted to make Voltaire my coffee name, but gave up the first try. The Starbucks girl could not spell it.

For some reason, when people ask my name and I don't want to give it I always say, "Sheila."

This, of course, indicates your secret (but totally understandable) desire to be an Aussie...

I don't know-- isn't that like calling myself "Dumb Broad"?

[Robert_S]

I wanted to make Voltaire my coffee name, but gave up the first try. The Starbucks girl could not spell it.

For some reason, when people ask my name and I don't want to give it I always say, "Sheila."

This, of course, indicates your secret (but totally understandable) desire to be an Aussie...

I don't know-- isn't that like calling myself "Dumb Broad"?

Or maybe you're saying you're Ready for the World!

[Jason]

Yeah, well. I don't see why atheists don't just kill themselves.

Seriously? It's hard to believe Tolstoy is as respected as he is, with a viewpoint I associate with fundie dimwits.

.
A very nice boil down of this whole argument. Nuff said.

But he's got a Russian name and there are lots of pages per book, so it's DEEP!

I'm inclined to think from some short works and Crime and Punishment that he's more of a twat than a fucktard.

[Robert_S]

Yeah, well. I don't see why atheists don't just kill themselves.

Seriously? It's hard to believe Tolstoy is as respected as he is, with a viewpoint I associate with fundie dimwits.

.
A very nice boil down of this whole argument. Nuff said.

But he's got a Russian name and there are lots of pages per book, so it's DEEP!

I'm inclined to think from some short works and Crime and Punishment that he's more of a twat than a fucktard.

Audley already pointed out how I confused the two Russians.

[Jason]

Oh. Well Dostoyevsky is brilliant.. though some of his work is boring as hell.

[Robert_S]

Oh. Well Dostoyevsky is brilliant.. though some of his work is boring as hell.

He's still kind of a twat though. Just not dumb.

[Tero]

I wanted to make Voltaire my coffee name, but gave up the first try. The Starbucks girl could not spell it.

For some reason, when people ask my name and I don't want to give it I always say, "Sheila."

OK, I'll try Sheila next time. Or Shel?

[hadespussercats]

I wanted to make Voltaire my coffee name, but gave up the first try. The Starbucks girl could not spell it.

For some reason, when people ask my name and I don't want to give it I always say, "Sheila."

OK, I'll try Sheila next time. Or Shel?

Shel Silverstein!