Joseph fucked Mary

Holy Crap!
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Re: Joseph fucked Mary

Post by Tyrannical » Wed Feb 06, 2013 5:14 pm

Baptists beleive in Jesus having literal half siblings, but I'm not sure how common a belief that is with other Christian denominations. Sometimes the same word for brother / sister also referred to first cousins.
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Re: Joseph fucked Mary

Post by Svartalf » Wed Feb 06, 2013 8:16 pm

Gawdzilla Sama wrote:Actually, there was no penetration according to apologists, so the guy that got Mary's cherry was her own son, the first living male to enter her vagina.
he didn't enter, he exited, and I maintain the Gabby got her preggers the conventional way
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Re: Joseph fucked Mary

Post by Audley Strange » Wed Feb 06, 2013 8:27 pm

The Jesus in the Bible is a fictional character. It may be "inspired" by true events, but that doesn't make Citizen Kane a documentary about an actual Newspaper Tycoon even if inspired by one.
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Re: Joseph fucked Mary

Post by Tero » Wed Feb 06, 2013 8:29 pm

Psst: Don't tell anyone. That way we can have good sacrilegious thread titles in the public side too, not just the members areas.

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Re: Joseph fucked Mary

Post by Gawdzilla Sama » Wed Feb 06, 2013 9:48 pm

Svartalf wrote:
Gawdzilla Sama wrote:Actually, there was no penetration according to apologists, so the guy that got Mary's cherry was her own son, the first living male to enter her vagina.
he didn't enter, he exited, and I maintain the Gabby got her preggers the conventional way
He entered one end of the vagina, you physiological topography challenged Frenchman!
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Re: Joseph fucked Mary

Post by JimC » Thu Feb 07, 2013 8:50 am

Mystical sperm teleportation!

Good aiming, well done, Jahweh! :tup:
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Re: Joseph fucked Mary

Post by pErvinalia » Thu Feb 07, 2013 9:18 am

Didn't God fuck her, and then give birth to himself?
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Re: Joseph fucked Mary

Post by Svartalf » Thu Feb 07, 2013 9:29 am

Gabriel fucked her and said it was god who was the father.
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Re: Joseph fucked Mary

Post by pErvinalia » Thu Feb 07, 2013 10:15 am

Mary was such a slut.
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Re: Joseph fucked Mary

Post by Gawdzilla Sama » Thu Feb 07, 2013 10:58 am

This reminds me for some reason of the "real meaning behind the nursery rhymes." Little Jack Horner stole a deed, etc.
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Re: Joseph fucked Mary

Post by Tero » Fri Feb 08, 2013 2:36 am

Here is the Finnish, maybe it's closer to the Greek.
Katso, neitsyt tulee raskaaksi ja synnyttää pojan, ja hänelle annetaan nimeksi Immanuel -- se merkitsee: Jumala on meidän kanssamme.
24 Unesta herättyään Joosef teki niin kuin Herran enkeli oli käskenyt ja otti Marian vaimokseen. 25 Hän ei kuitenkaan koskenut vaimoonsa ennen kuin tämä oli synnyttänyt pojan. Joosef antoi pojalle nimen Jeesus.
He did not "touch her until she had delivered a boy.

It does not take a lot of interpretation to say that he did afterward.

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Re: Joseph fucked Mary

Post by Jason » Fri Feb 08, 2013 3:09 am

Did Joseph backdoor Mary?

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Re: Joseph fucked Mary

Post by pErvinalia » Fri Feb 08, 2013 3:36 am

I think he came in through the front (barn) door...
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Re: Joseph fucked Mary

Post by MrJonno » Sat Feb 09, 2013 4:45 pm

Mary wasnt real how sad, how am I'm going take the piss out of God being a paedophile and impregnating 12 year olds?
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Re: Joseph fucked Mary

Post by DaveDodo007 » Sun Feb 10, 2013 6:47 am

Mary: The tale of one women's lie about having an affair got out of hand.
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