Why Atheists Are Better Prepared for Death Than Believers

[maiforpeace]

My father-in-law's partner just passed away. Mercifully it did not drag on for more than six days because it was getting difficult to watch...pop was starting to talk about Kevorkian and euthanasia as it was getting very intense for him.

I am very sad, but I am also feeling pretty calm and centered about it all - she lived as good a life as someone can be expected to live when they have MS, and she had a good death, at home, surrounded by family and friends. It probably sounds weird of me to say this, but death is like breaking up...the first death you experience of someone close to you, it feels like you are going to die yourself. After you get a little experience, you know what to expect and it does get a bit easier. Of course, I couldn't compare it to losing a spouse, but it is comforting.

I do think much of it does have to do with my atheistic beliefs though...this article expresses my sentiments.

Why Atheists Are Better Prepared for Death Than Believers

What are your thoughts about death? Does being an atheist make it less scary?

[Pappa]

I've always been pretty good with death. I think it's partly due to having quite a few pets as a kid... you get used to dealing with grief on a smaller scale. But I can definitely see how my atheism helps too. Anyone who self-labels as an atheist is someone who has at least thought about the big questions in life and settled on an answer that involves an element of self-reliance. There's no crutch to face the onslaught of the universe when you can't turn to god every time times are hard (though I suppose there is beer ).

[Animavore]

Thus far, I have gotten over people's deaths within a couple of days. Usually after the funeral, during the wake.
I don't see the point in getting all cut up about it. My family, in general, are like this.

[Millefleur]

The first death close to me, besides family friends/distant relatives which were sad but didn't hugely effect me, was my mums, which knocked the shit out of me and left me in a really fucking shitty place for a long while. I know I'm not going to hell or some other fruity pipe dream so the only thing that worries me is the effect it'll have on anyone close to me, I wouldn't want my girls to go through what I did. Deaths pretty selfish.

[Bolero]

I think perhaps atheists are better prepared for other people's deaths, but I wouldn't say we're better prepared for our own. I mean, the idea of not existing anymore kind of freaks me out, whereas Xtians I know are quite convinced they're going to go to a better place, so (they say) they're not worried.

[Rum]

Thus far, I have gotten over people's deaths within a couple of days. Usually after the funeral, during the wake.
I don't see the point in getting all cut up about it. My family, in general, are like this.

I think it takes a while longer to get over your own though!

[Ronja]

Thanks Mai for posting the link. It is a really good article, well worth reading in all its length.

I don't have any deep insight in the issue, just a personal feeling of being much less nervous about my own death after I became an atheist.

[leo-rcc]

Thus far, I have gotten over people's deaths within a couple of days. Usually after the funeral, during the wake.
I don't see the point in getting all cut up about it. My family, in general, are like this.

I think it takes a while longer to get over your own though!

Meh, I'll probably not give it another thought after it happened.

[Thinking Aloud]

I think perhaps atheists are better prepared for other people's deaths, but I wouldn't say we're better prepared for our own. I mean, the idea of not existing anymore kind of freaks me out, whereas Xtians I know are quite convinced they're going to go to a better place, so (they say) they're not worried.

It's easy to say one isn't worried until it's actually happening. I wonder why there aren't a lot more martyrs out there - is it, perhaps, because ultimately no-one is absolutely sure what's going to happen next, and worried just slightly that they might be wrong? Why, over the centuries, have we striven to extend and maintain individual human lives regardless of condition, if we were sure that dying was just the start of something better?

I think most people have an instinctive feeling that this life is all they get, but it scares them to admit it - talk of an afterlife just makes it easier not to have to face.

I also suspect that people's view of death changes with age. I'm probably, on average, about half way through my life. If I was diagnosed with something terminal tomorrow, I'd probably be somewhat taken aback and feel a little short-changed. I'd also be worried about my family being thrown into a difficult position since the kids are still young. At the age of 80 I'll maybe have had enough. I've heard more than one anecdote of an elderly relative or friend who has either said that they'd had enough or were "ready" - and also quite a few who've done little things (given gifts, hung around a day or two to see friends and relations one last time) just before dying.

I used to think they were all watching me from somewhere else - that seems absurd to me now. For myself, I will continue to assume that being dead will be very very similar to not having been conceived - didn't bother me then, won't bother me when I'm gone.

[fordo]

i'm well prepared for death, my own any how. in that i finalised my will and did all i has to do for my funeral arangements, this has fuck all to do with me being an atheist i think, but that said i plan to avoid the afore mentioned event for as long as possible.

[irretating]

I think perhaps atheists are better prepared for other people's deaths, but I wouldn't say we're better prepared for our own. I mean, the idea of not existing anymore kind of freaks me out, whereas Xtians I know are quite convinced they're going to go to a better place, so (they say) they're not worried.

I think the opposite. I have no fear of the nothingness for me when I kick the bucket, but the utter finality of death makes it hard to cope with loved ones' passing.

[Rum]

This is of course at the heart of what being an atheist is about. Even people of faith who are wobbling in their beliefs hold on to a degree of hope, which perhaps offers them something in life in terms of a buffer against the fear of death. Atheists don't have that. Perhaps most o us don't actually want it either.