Bringing New Meaning to "Taking It Up the Tailpipe"

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Bringing New Meaning to "Taking It Up the Tailpipe"

Post by Bella Fortuna » Thu May 19, 2011 7:20 pm

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstop ... -cars.html

Man admits having sex with 1,000 cars
A man who claims to have had sex with 1,000 cars has defended his "romantic" feelings towards vehicles.

12:20PM BST 21 May 2008

Edward Smith, who lives with his current "girlfriend" – a white Volkswagen Beetle named Vanilla, insisted that he was not "sick" and had no desire to change his ways.

"I appreciate beauty and I go a little bit beyond appreciating the beauty of a car only to the point of what I feel is an expression of love," he said.

"Maybe I'm a little bit off the wall but when I see movies like Herbie and Knight Rider, where cars become loveable, huggable characters it's just wonderful.

"I'm a romantic. I write poetry about cars, I sing to them and talk to them just like a girlfriend. I know what's in my heart and I have no desire to change."

He added: "I'm not sick and I don't want to hurt anyone, cars are just my preference."

Mr Smith, 57, first had sex with a car at the age of 15, and claims he has never been attracted to women or men.

But his wandering eye has spread beyond cars to other vehicles. He says that his most intense sexual experience was "making love" to the helicopter from 1980s TV hit Airwolf.

As well as Vanilla, he regularly spends time with his other vehicles – a 1973 Opal GT, named Cinnamon, and 1993 Ford Ranger Splash, named Ginger.

Before Vanilla, he had a five-year relationship with Victoria, a 1969 VW Beetle he bought from a family of Jehovah's Witnesses.

But he confesses that many of the cars he has had sex with have belonged to strangers or car showrooms.

His last relationship with a woman was 12 years ago - and he could not bring himself to consummate it, although he did have sex with girls in his younger days.

Mr Smith, from Washington state in the US, kept quiet about his secret fetish for years, but agreed to be interviewed as part of a channel Five documentary into “mechaphilia”. He is shown meeting other enthusiasts at a rally in California

Talking about how his unusual passion developed, Mr Smith said: "It's something that grew as a part of me when I was a kid and I could not shake it.

"I just loved cute cars right from the beginning, but over the years it got stronger once I got into my teenage years and was my first having sexual urges.

"When I turned 13 and the famous Corvette Stingray came about, that car was pure sex and just an incredible machine. I wanted it.

"I didn't fully understand it myself except that I know I'm not hurting anyone and I do not intend to."

He added: "There are moments way out in the middle of nowhere when I see a little car parked and I swear it needs loving.

"There have been certain cars that attracted me and I would wait until night time, creep up to them and just hug and kiss them.

"As far as women go, they never really interested me much. And I'm not gay.”

Mr Smith is now part of a global community of more than 500 “car lovers” brought together by internet forums.
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Re: Bringing New Meaning to "Taking It Up the Tailpipe"

Post by Geoff » Thu May 19, 2011 7:22 pm

He must be exhausted...
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Re: Bringing New Meaning to "Taking It Up the Tailpipe"

Post by Millefleur » Thu May 19, 2011 7:22 pm


Edward Smith, who lives with his current "girlfriend" – a white Volkswagen Beetle named Vanilla, insisted that he was not "sick" and had no desire to change his ways.

That ain't vanilla :hilarious:
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Yeah. But isn't it wonderful?

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Re: Bringing New Meaning to "Taking It Up the Tailpipe"

Post by Animavore » Thu May 19, 2011 7:22 pm

brings a new meaning to the term 'autoerotic'.
Libertarianism: The belief that out of all the terrible things governments can do, helping people is the absolute worst.

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Re: Bringing New Meaning to "Taking It Up the Tailpipe"

Post by Bella Fortuna » Thu May 19, 2011 7:23 pm

Animavore wrote:brings a new meaning to the term 'autoerotic'.
Bella likes this
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Re: Bringing New Meaning to "Taking It Up the Tailpipe"

Post by Mr P » Thu May 19, 2011 7:23 pm

Rule 34?

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Re: Bringing New Meaning to "Taking It Up the Tailpipe"

Post by Thinking Aloud » Thu May 19, 2011 7:24 pm

That guy also had sex with Airwolf back in the 1980s. Don't ask me how I know that.

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Re: Bringing New Meaning to "Taking It Up the Tailpipe"

Post by Bella Fortuna » Thu May 19, 2011 7:25 pm

Thinking Aloud wrote:That guy also had sex with Airwolf back in the 1980s. Don't ask me how I know that.
Thought you'd notice that. :tea:
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Re: Bringing New Meaning to "Taking It Up the Tailpipe"

Post by Bella Fortuna » Thu May 19, 2011 7:27 pm

And please don't tell me you're also a member of the "I ♥ Sex with Airwolf" forum... :?
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Re: Bringing New Meaning to "Taking It Up the Tailpipe"

Post by Thinking Aloud » Thu May 19, 2011 7:29 pm

Bella Fortuna wrote:
Thinking Aloud wrote:That guy also had sex with Airwolf back in the 1980s. Don't ask me how I know that.
Thought you'd notice that. :tea:
Ah - sorry - I see now it was in the article. I knew as soon as I saw his name.

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Re: Bringing New Meaning to "Taking It Up the Tailpipe"

Post by Bella Fortuna » Thu May 19, 2011 7:30 pm

Thinking Aloud wrote:
Bella Fortuna wrote:
Thinking Aloud wrote:That guy also had sex with Airwolf back in the 1980s. Don't ask me how I know that.
Thought you'd notice that. :tea:
Ah - sorry - I see now it was in the article. I knew as soon as I saw his name.
I demand an explanation as to how you knew that before. :ask:
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Re: Bringing New Meaning to "Taking It Up the Tailpipe"

Post by Animavore » Thu May 19, 2011 7:31 pm

OK - I have to know.


How do you know that?
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Re: Bringing New Meaning to "Taking It Up the Tailpipe"

Post by Thinking Aloud » Thu May 19, 2011 7:35 pm

(I've read the article before...)

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Re: Bringing New Meaning to "Taking It Up the Tailpipe"

Post by drl2 » Thu May 19, 2011 7:38 pm

Pretty sure I've posted this here before on a thread about Rule 34, but it seems slightly relevant:

Sec with cars is sick, unless you're a dragon.
Who needs a signature anyway?

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Re: Bringing New Meaning to "Taking It Up the Tailpipe"

Post by Thinking Aloud » Thu May 19, 2011 7:44 pm

And here he is:

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